Another common, or maybe I should say commonly talked about form of harassment, is sexual harassment at work that is targeted at junior officers by senior officers.
When we speak of sexual harassment the loose definition is behavior at work that is intended to cause either unusually high sexual attention or create uncomfortable circumstances loaded with sexual intent.
You will find that the discussion and parameters of sexual harassment in the work place are so fluid that it is hard to tell where normal human instinct and reaction to the opposite gender ends and where sexual harassment begins.
In this post, I will only speak of sexual harassment from men in senior positions that they direct at ladies in a lower positions. Then we will keep adding more variations as the week moves on.
In my years in Human Resource Management, sexual harassment by senior male officers directed at junior female officers are the most disgusting yet the most difficult cases to handle.
If you find yourself in the presence of a psychotic male boss who doesn't know where his zipper ends and his head starts, realize that you are in the presence of a male predator; an animal in human clothes. They are a dangerous species giving most men a very bad name.
What do you need to know about such situations and how should you respond?
• Realize that a boss who directs deliberate suggestions for sex with you is committing a crime. There are appropriate places to do and say all things; the office is NOT for soliciting sexual favors and he is in gross abuse of office.
• Find a female senior management officer you can speak to FAST. Speak to her as you would to a counselor, stating what happened and what you think the situation was about without making any accusations.
• Keep clear off the fellow's radar as much as you can. If asked to stay late at work, ask a friend to hang out in the office with you. If the boss inquires why the other person is there, tell him you live in a dangerous area and you MUST go home together. Do not bow to his offers to take you home – UNLESS YOU ARE WILLING TO GO ALONG WITH HIS INTENTIONS.
IMPORTANT NOTE:
Ladies, you will fast realize that in these situations you will be accused of leading the man on. It is rare, except you have a mature woman in the company that women themselves will not see you as a victim; they will want to make you the villain. To help your case, guard your dressing.
Related posts: Dressing and sexual harassment at work
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Showing posts with label jobs. Show all posts
Showing posts with label jobs. Show all posts
Jobs in Kenya – dressing and sexual harassment at work
When working on a job in Kenya you may have to deal with sexual harassment issues. There are two sides to every story and the sexual harassment one is no different. What are the two sides?
Your side and the side of one harassing; or your side and side of the one you are harassing, (lol…) In this tip, we will only speak about women's dressing as a trigger or weapon of sexual harassment.
Dressing as a trigger: Many newly employed graduates dress in a provocative manner. It is a carry forward of their teenage and college wardrobe. When they get demeaning and lewd stares, they choose to defend their dress-style.
News flash! Provocative dressing in Kenya is largely ignored when it is on the back of a teenager. When you are working, it is not. It simply says; I am willing and available for whatever you want.
If you want to reduce the incidences of being treated like a tramp – close that top button, drop your hems, and loosen the width of the skirts and trousers.
Dressing as a weapon: the easiest targets on this one are the men because men, through no fault of their own like to 'see'. If you have a female colleague who has an eye on you or one who has beef (such as an upcoming promotion she is eyeing) you can easily become a target for sexual harassment.
Tips to handle harassment directed at you:
- Women do not suddenly develop a sexual interest in a man. So be warned, if she suddenly is cozy and touchy and feline – RUN! She is not attracted to you mister – she's in for a kill!
- Talk about it! Make a comment to colleagues (loudly as much as possible) about the new dress style. Compliment her; make sure she knows you're on to her strategy, but do not get nasty.
- Do not encourage her at all. You know how to tune a girl, I am sure – this one is not a candidate for your charms.
- If the fire gets too hot – run! Literally!
Those seeking 'jobz-wizdom' for the Kenyan jobs market read
Why the new Kenyan constitution is scary or exciting for job seekers
If you are one of those interesting people who 'jihurumia kuwa Mkenya' you finally have one GOOD reason to 'jivunia kuwa Mkenya', namely, a home-grown constitution.
Forty five long years later, we are out of the legal-strings of our benefactor, Britain, and are now living in our own house with rules we made ourselves.
If that doesn’t excite you, I have no idea what will at national level.
Take time to read the new Constitution
I have heard many people say the constitution of Kenya is long and bulky unlike the constitution of the United States. To those I like to say, well, just go there, live there and see it for yourself. There is no need to have a written document of rules if you already live those rules.
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When you win, 'we' win, yet when you win, its always 'you' who wins!
Cross Country Olympics in
It is the best we have ever done as a nation, and the last time Kenya
Ah! My eyes were wet with tears as I watched the events – on TV no less. They all made me so proud!
Yet it really isn’t Kenya that won, it is eight individuals who won, and those individuals happened to come from Kenya
That is the story of your life. You do not win as a state, you win as an individual that happens to represent the nation in whatsoever it is you do.
What takes a while for most of us to understand, is that people do not win on the outside first, then start to feel like winners inside thereafter.
Identifying Your Opportunities
So what is this thing about focusing on what we desire to get what we want?
It is the law of life. It is how you cooperate with the Creator – and everyone has access to their Creator.
It’s funny to even try and logically imagine that a responsible all-knowing and intelligent God would have you living a life where you need another creature equal to yourself in power and knowledge serve as your connect.
The system to connect to your creator is there within you all the time. It is not something you learn in an institution or from books – it is within you.
It is the law of life. It is how you cooperate with the Creator – and everyone has access to their Creator.
It’s funny to even try and logically imagine that a responsible all-knowing and intelligent God would have you living a life where you need another creature equal to yourself in power and knowledge serve as your connect.
The system to connect to your creator is there within you all the time. It is not something you learn in an institution or from books – it is within you.
With your faith and confidence in place, God is working to enable you find a job in Kenya
Life takes on the form of the predominant thought pattern of the individual.
For the purpose of this post, we will restrain ourselves to the life results of an adult.
What an individual has in their innermost regular thought pattern, that is what will evidence itself in their lives.
Now that truth poses a big challenge to most people because we often prefer to think that there is a huge mean God somewhere out there bringing on our horrible experiences.
For the purpose of this post, we will restrain ourselves to the life results of an adult.
What an individual has in their innermost regular thought pattern, that is what will evidence itself in their lives.
Now that truth poses a big challenge to most people because we often prefer to think that there is a huge mean God somewhere out there bringing on our horrible experiences.
Jobs in Kenya are all over the place to the one with a working personal plan
There’s a hilarious piece that does the rounds on Facebook titled, ‘You know you have an African Mother when…’
It is a stark reminder that most of us grew up with very similar set of rules. The does and don’ts did not vary too much. These then went on to form our corporate belief systems years later.
By that article, and certainly by experience, one of the typical answers if we questioned why we should do something mum said should be done was, ‘because I said so’. This invocation of the infallibility of the authority of ‘mum’ was stated with such finality, that even the young mind would not find any further creative genius to pursue an alternative option. Mum said you do it, she is the authority – enough said. With that, the institution of ‘mum’ was elevated to infallibility.
It is a stark reminder that most of us grew up with very similar set of rules. The does and don’ts did not vary too much. These then went on to form our corporate belief systems years later.
By that article, and certainly by experience, one of the typical answers if we questioned why we should do something mum said should be done was, ‘because I said so’. This invocation of the infallibility of the authority of ‘mum’ was stated with such finality, that even the young mind would not find any further creative genius to pursue an alternative option. Mum said you do it, she is the authority – enough said. With that, the institution of ‘mum’ was elevated to infallibility.
You are created with all the power to help you find jobs in Kenya
I was watching a road show footage aired on one of the local television stations over the weekend. For the presenters, the MC and the performers it was all a celebration. But what caught my attention most were the faces of the people surrounding the presenters. These people were supposed to be entertained. But from their faces, they were an unhappy lot. One look at their faces and you were clear the only people celebrating were the fellows on the stage.
It pulled my heart strings because the sad despairing face is so common amongst Kenyans – especially in major urban centres. I friend visiting from the UK once gave me what I thought was a very apt description. She called it silent desperation. You see it all the time; that hollow look in peoples eyes because they seem to have lost hope.
The question I asked myself is, hope in what? What have they lost hope in? The government?
It pulled my heart strings because the sad despairing face is so common amongst Kenyans – especially in major urban centres. I friend visiting from the UK once gave me what I thought was a very apt description. She called it silent desperation. You see it all the time; that hollow look in peoples eyes because they seem to have lost hope.
The question I asked myself is, hope in what? What have they lost hope in? The government?
Choose the mind-set that supports your goals
The truth of the matter is, when you start with a mind-set that what you seek is not available, then you are more likely to miss what is right before your eyes. When you are sure of what you seek, then you are more likely to see it.
The story is told of the first people who were present at the Kenyan coast when the first Arab dhow was sighted on the distant horizon. For days, some people tried to point out the strange item visible on the horizon to their friends. Majority would not see it. Then the few who could ‘see’ it, started to describe the thing that they saw. Only when their descriptions became more vivid did the people start to perceive the dhow.
The human perception is powerful. If you believe it exists, you will see it.
You can carry out this experiment for yourself. Ask several people who are in a job already if they know of any vacancies anywhere. Anything; any cadre, any profession, never mind the position. It is a powerful eye opener. You will quickly discover that every person in a job knows of at least one job opening some place. Now that is not particularly useful to you if the vacancy is for a watchman, and what you seek is a different position.
But the same rule applies to the particular jobs that you seek. If everyone you asked, randomly, knows of a position someplace, then it follows that there are people that you likely do not know who know of the availability of the position you seek.
That is your power. The decision to find those people is what will start to open your eyes to ways to find the right people who have the information on the specific jobs in Kenya that you seek.
I work with different people all the time; government officers, private business people, professionals, unskilled workers, and others. I am aware that there is no single week that passes when I do not meet someone who starts a sentence with, ‘am looking for someone who can…’
Finding the people who are asking for an employee who can do what you can do, is the single most important thing to enable you find jobs in Kenya. Do not worry about ‘the government is not giving the youth jobs’. The solution is not with the government, it is in you.
If you have the right personal plan in place, everywhere you are opens up a chance to find jobs in Kenya.
By Paula Thayrow – 8th December 2009
The story is told of the first people who were present at the Kenyan coast when the first Arab dhow was sighted on the distant horizon. For days, some people tried to point out the strange item visible on the horizon to their friends. Majority would not see it. Then the few who could ‘see’ it, started to describe the thing that they saw. Only when their descriptions became more vivid did the people start to perceive the dhow.
The human perception is powerful. If you believe it exists, you will see it.
You can carry out this experiment for yourself. Ask several people who are in a job already if they know of any vacancies anywhere. Anything; any cadre, any profession, never mind the position. It is a powerful eye opener. You will quickly discover that every person in a job knows of at least one job opening some place. Now that is not particularly useful to you if the vacancy is for a watchman, and what you seek is a different position.
But the same rule applies to the particular jobs that you seek. If everyone you asked, randomly, knows of a position someplace, then it follows that there are people that you likely do not know who know of the availability of the position you seek.
That is your power. The decision to find those people is what will start to open your eyes to ways to find the right people who have the information on the specific jobs in Kenya that you seek.
I work with different people all the time; government officers, private business people, professionals, unskilled workers, and others. I am aware that there is no single week that passes when I do not meet someone who starts a sentence with, ‘am looking for someone who can…’
Finding the people who are asking for an employee who can do what you can do, is the single most important thing to enable you find jobs in Kenya. Do not worry about ‘the government is not giving the youth jobs’. The solution is not with the government, it is in you.
If you have the right personal plan in place, everywhere you are opens up a chance to find jobs in Kenya.
By Paula Thayrow – 8th December 2009
Your mind-set makes or breaks your search for jobs in Kenya
Reality takes on the form of the person observing it.
Isn’t that a rather strange thing to say?
Let me explain how that works.
Let us say your friend has bought a new mobile phone. It is a real cool phone, with all the funky functions. Its shiny, it’s cool and it is in your eyes the perfect phone.
When your friend bought this phone, they took time to show it to you and you spent time looking at it. So you are now familiar with the way it ‘looks’.
Suddenly, as you walk on the streets, get onto a public transport vehicle, walk around your neighbourhood, you start to see other people with the same phone.
Question? Did all those people pick a phone similar to the one that your friend has just after you saw it?
Isn’t that a rather strange thing to say?
Let me explain how that works.
Let us say your friend has bought a new mobile phone. It is a real cool phone, with all the funky functions. Its shiny, it’s cool and it is in your eyes the perfect phone.
When your friend bought this phone, they took time to show it to you and you spent time looking at it. So you are now familiar with the way it ‘looks’.
Suddenly, as you walk on the streets, get onto a public transport vehicle, walk around your neighbourhood, you start to see other people with the same phone.
Question? Did all those people pick a phone similar to the one that your friend has just after you saw it?
How you perceive your ability to find jobs in Kenya is crucial to your success
By Paula Thayrow – 4th December 2009
There are some things that are spoken of as though they are so real only to be revealed as unreal on further scrutiny.
In speaking of road accidents in Kenya, for instance, it is widely reported that ‘the vehicle lost control’. This gives the impression that the vehicle was no longer in control and thus lost grip of the road and thus the accident.
This is reported so widely that it is now perceived to be a reality that ‘vehicles lose control’.
That is an unreal reality. Vehicles never lose control because they never had it in the first place; it is the driver of the vehicle who loses control of it. Only a human being has the amazing ability to be or not to be in control.
These unreal realities are referred to in finer English as perceptions. A perception is not necessarily a truth; it is often a perceived reality that then becomes the experience of the individual who believes it.
That is how, when I was growing up, my mother would hold us all ransom to search for her car keys. It would be at that desperate moment when we all are ‘finally’ ready to leave the house so that we can get to school on time. Then mum would ‘lose’ her car keys and like a true general, she would gather all her brood to this great march to find her ‘lost’ keys.
Then after we had searched everywhere in the house (another perception) and it started to appear that we would surely be late for school, one of us would recall the last time this had happened. This brilliant individual would start to question the perception we all held up to that point. They would then ask the question that would set all of us free; are mums’ keys really ‘lost’?
At which point we would all pivot our eyes on mum’s hand, and there, tightly clasped would be my good mother’s ‘lost’ keys. (I now think it was her way of getting us to work, together, in one accord on a single project, at least thrice a year.)
‘There are no jobs in Kenya’ is a perception that is persistently true to the individual who believes it, but it is really just another unreal reality. Your perception of how difficult it is to find jobs in Kenya is true, until you decide to challenge it. The minute you change your perception, your reality changes too.
Dare to challenge your perceptions about the job situation in Kenya for your sake.
There are some things that are spoken of as though they are so real only to be revealed as unreal on further scrutiny.
In speaking of road accidents in Kenya, for instance, it is widely reported that ‘the vehicle lost control’. This gives the impression that the vehicle was no longer in control and thus lost grip of the road and thus the accident.
This is reported so widely that it is now perceived to be a reality that ‘vehicles lose control’.
That is an unreal reality. Vehicles never lose control because they never had it in the first place; it is the driver of the vehicle who loses control of it. Only a human being has the amazing ability to be or not to be in control.
These unreal realities are referred to in finer English as perceptions. A perception is not necessarily a truth; it is often a perceived reality that then becomes the experience of the individual who believes it.
That is how, when I was growing up, my mother would hold us all ransom to search for her car keys. It would be at that desperate moment when we all are ‘finally’ ready to leave the house so that we can get to school on time. Then mum would ‘lose’ her car keys and like a true general, she would gather all her brood to this great march to find her ‘lost’ keys.
Then after we had searched everywhere in the house (another perception) and it started to appear that we would surely be late for school, one of us would recall the last time this had happened. This brilliant individual would start to question the perception we all held up to that point. They would then ask the question that would set all of us free; are mums’ keys really ‘lost’?
At which point we would all pivot our eyes on mum’s hand, and there, tightly clasped would be my good mother’s ‘lost’ keys. (I now think it was her way of getting us to work, together, in one accord on a single project, at least thrice a year.)
‘There are no jobs in Kenya’ is a perception that is persistently true to the individual who believes it, but it is really just another unreal reality. Your perception of how difficult it is to find jobs in Kenya is true, until you decide to challenge it. The minute you change your perception, your reality changes too.
Dare to challenge your perceptions about the job situation in Kenya for your sake.
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